


the only words I know

by galacticdrift (Ancalime)



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: First Time, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 06:42:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20756027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ancalime/pseuds/galacticdrift
Summary: Inspired by a softer world #821





	the only words I know

When he kisses Caduceus, there's an endless flood of worries running through the back of his mind-- _is he going too fast, are they both, is Cad just going along with this, is someone going to walk in on them, is it just the combat high, is it a terrible idea to conduct a romance in the middle of everything else, is this thing between them going to end tomorrow, in a month, in a year, in pain, in heartbreak, in tragedy, in death--_

But he can't seem to hang on to them. One by one, as they kiss, his questions all slip away from him, somehow, without him even noticing.

Only time will tell if they're moving too fast, he knows that much. And the way Cad plucks at Fjord's armor and his hoarse murmur of _let's get you out of this_ dispels any concerns Fjord might have about his reluctance. Under Fjord's hands, Cad's ribs expand, and Fjord leans in to nuzzle against his neck, one of Cad's arms trapped between them as he continues to work on Fjord's bracers.

Cad's shirt bunches under Fjord's hands, and he relishes the sensual feel of silk passing over short, fine fur before tugging it up and over Cad's head as soon as he finishes with the bracers.

Taking a step back and glancing at the door, Fjord flips the lock, then shoots Cad a rueful grin. "Not that that will stop anyone we know if they decide they want to come in."

"Then they deserve whatever eyeful they might happen to get." Cad cocks his head, ears flicking with humor.

"Fair enough." Laughing, Fjord shrugs out of his breastplate and surcoat and steps back into Cad's arms, letting himself be caught up and led a few steps farther into the room, until Cad hits the bed behind them and sits down.

"On second thought, I might want to keep this view to myself," Cad murmurs, gaze roving over Fjord's bare chest.

"They've all seen it before anyway," Fjord says, smiling as he cups Cad's face in his hands and drops kisses along Cad's cheekbones and broad, flat nose.

With Caduceus sitting down, Fjord is taller, and he gets a different perspective than usual. It's strange to look down at him, and it brings a crooked smile to Fjord's face. Meanwhile, Cad's fingers are busy running along Fjord's waistband, a teasing touch that has Fjord's stomach fluttering and his breath escaping in a sigh.

He tilts Cad's head with his hands, sliding one back and tracing along the shaved spiral design with his thumb. Fjord hopes it's not sacrilegious to think of it as a gesture of prayer in a sense, his silent thanks to Melora: that he's grateful to her not just for taking him into her service, but for bringing himself and Caduceus together in the first place.

"You're thinking too loudly," Caduceus says, eyes closed. "I'm pretty sure that's not conducive to the experience."

"Sorry," Fjord says against his lips. Here he is, trying to make it good for Caduceus and instead getting all caught up in his own head--

Caduceus pinches his waist. Fjord lets out a yelp. "You're doing it again. Fjord, if you're nervous, we don't have to--"

"No!" Fjord presses forward, climbing onto the bed, guiding Caduceus to lie back and sprawling half on top of him. Only once he's tucked his face back in against Cad's neck can he summon up the honesty to continue. "No, I-- I am nervous, I'll admit, but not out of reluctance."

"Yeah," Cad says, with gentle yet pointed humor, shifting under him until Fjord can feel a long, bony thigh press up against his growing hardness. His hips flex in an instinctual grind. "I do get that impression."

"You--!" Laughing, Fjord nips at his throat and sends a hand skating down his ribs to unfasten both their pants. The deep rumble of Caduceus chuckling rattles his own chest.

Caduceus draws Fjord's face up to kiss him, knuckles curled under his chin, and Fjord sinks into it. There's little urgency; Cad sets an almost languid pace, and the slow back and forth starts to make Fjord feel like he's drifting. Like the tide, wave after wave rushing onto sand, then retreating again.

How long they stay like that, just kissing, Fjord can't tell. He learns the soft low noises of pleasure he can draw from Caduceus, the sensitive spot above his ear and the one just under the hinge of his jaw that makes him arch and then melt, his fingers scrabbling at Fjord's back.

He makes a few forays downward, kissing his way down Cad's neck and along his collarbone, but he finds that with Cad's fur he has a hard time getting the kind of suction he would need to leave a good hard mark, and more importantly, it doesn't seem to do much for Cad in the first place. He does tease Cad's nipples with his thumbs, and get it returned on him in equal measure; Cad, for his part, takes his cues well and quickly, without so much as a word exchanged between them -- and he has no such physiological issues with leaving marks. Fjord knows he's going to be wearing some of the ones he receives for days. It's not an unwelcome prospect, he thinks, breathless, fingers buried in Cad's hair and clutching helplessly as he worries at Fjord's collarbone.

When Cad reaches down between them it's almost a shock; Fjord certainly hasn't _forgotten_ he's fully hard and from what he can tell Cad is as well. It's just that he'd gotten so absorbed in the kissing that he'd disconnected it from the concept of going any further.

The touch of Cad's hand has Fjord groaning open-mouthed against Cad's jaw as he rolls his hips, chasing it. He's not sure he would last if he actually looked down and got the visual to match the sensation of Caduceus's fingers wrapped around him -- all the more so when Cad frees himself from his pants and Fjord can feel the hot length of him against his hip.

They could just rut against each other to completion; Fjord's close enough it wouldn't take long. So is Cad, from the gut-punched noise he makes as Fjord takes him in hand. His breathing is ragged, ruffling Fjord's hair, and his free hand flexes, leaving trails of pleasant fire as his fingernails scrape against the back of Fjord's neck.

Fjord grabs his hand and guides him to wrap it around both of them together, bracing himself on his elbows and applying himself with what scant focus he has left to those tender spots on Caduceus's throat he discovered earlier. Between Cad's hand, the noises Fjord draws from him, and the sensation of the two of them sliding against each other, Fjord struggles with his commitment to bring Caduceus to completion first, and it's a near thing. Cad shudders and shakes underneath him, warm wetness spreading where his hand encircles them both as he spills himself, and that's what pushes Fjord over the edge.

For a moment his whole mind goes white as surf.

When his head clears, Fjord is sprawled across Cad's chest, both of them breathing heavily. Cad's got one arm curled around him, fingers making idle circles on his back. It's a feeling he never wants to end.

Unwilling to form actual words just yet, he turns his head and makes a questioning noise, planting a kiss on Cad's throat just next to the divot in the middle of his collarbone. A low, pleased rumble from Caduceus vibrates through him, and he feels the arm around him tighten for just a moment.

Fjord closes his eyes and listens as Caduceus falls asleep. The rise and fall of Cad's chest lulls him, and he drifts on it like a raft, until he finally drops off as well.

**Author's Note:**

> _When you touch me, my mind is gone. The only words I know are lost inside your body. (right in there.)_


End file.
